ECLIPSE OF DELUSION
I had been told at several teen programs in church that my body is the temple of God and hence, the need to handle it with so much respect and care. The word meant a lot to me and that exactly was the way I handled the words of preachers since I barely carry the bible to read.
I was so interested in giving maximum satisfaction to the temple of God in all aspects of life.
I also understood that God is not a fan of pre-marital sex and other associated sexual sins until Muyiwa, one of my seniors in boarding school brainwashed me. He gave me several counter explanations and looked deep into my eyes each time he talked with me.
“It is true that your body is the temple of God but what is so wrong about giving satisfaction to the temple of God which is your body?” Those exactly were his counter points and he didn’t find it difficult to convince me.
I had caught him masturbating with body cream inside the senior students’ bathroom and that single incidence was the genesis of teenage revolution for me.
He told me how much he loved God, how much he obeys God’s commandments and makes God feel happy with him. He argued that teen pastors exaggerate the words of the Bible just to make Christian life unbearable for teenagers.
Despite the minute quality of his argument, I believed him easily and my reasons were clear.
Other senior students who often would absorb the “chronic Christian” attitude were wicked in their ways and conduct to junior students but Muyiwa at least is a lot better.
He taught me how to masturbate stating the various ointments I could use. I received the greatest shock when he told me masturbating with anointing oil could make demon far away from someone possessed. This he claimed was one of the tools many pastors use to cast out demon.
The first day I tried it was also the day I had my first seminal expulsion (ejaculation). I felt so good and satisfied from deep within with the inner feeling that God was happy with me for making his temple feel so good.
At a time I masturbated on daily basis, later twice and later it turned to a three square meal since it would cost me little or no energy and God would be happy at the same time.
Pastors preached severally about the topic at every teen gathering that I was opportune to attend but their words sounded vague and none had the driving force to conflict with the words of Muyiwa. I knew already that the mission of every teen pastor was to make life unbearable for teenage Christians.
I was caught in the act by the boarding house captain and he, without yielding to any appeal reported me to the boarding house master who doubled as the school Christian fellowship coordinator.
He transmitted me like electric current to the fellowship deliverance ministers. They prayed in English, Yoruba and tongues for hours while I lie on the floor day dreaming about my next moment of masturbation with my eyes closed.
Third term break was always the longest and I was very happy to go home since it meant I would have enough time and space to myself.
I had a very bad result that term and that was the first time since I started school that I would go back home on a sessional break without a single subject prize. I didn’t understand the reason behind it but I lied to my mum that sickness during exam was the reason behind my under performance.
My mum complained severally that her body cream finished too early since I got home. She was curious about it but stopped complaining at a point and that made no single SENSE to me.
I was on heat one unfriendly evening and I was feeling emotionally disturbed. My mum already hid her cream and I had squandered mine. I hadn’t masturbated in days and it was as if hell was venting its anger against me. I took the bold step to make an ultimate search of my mum’s cream in her room while she watched super story in the living room. I finally found it hiding in a corner beside her shoe rack. I hurried, took the quantity I needed and rushed into the toilet without any of my SENSE working.
I screamed with great pains and my voice propagated its waves to the living room that my mum could hear. She came to my rescue only to see her son naked with his penis shinning brighter than his body. She laughed at the first instance and told me she deliberately placed Chinese balm in her Vaseline container just to camouflage for the sake of catching me red handed.
She carried me to her room where she poured the word of God into my senses while I felt the pepperish discomfort of the balm at the same time. It was a proper education on sexual practices and this time, it sank deep into the petroleum sector of my heart’s economy probably as a result of the power in my mum’s words, the discomfort from the Chinese balm and God’s intervention. It indeed was the exact reformatting my system required.
That day for me was the end of masturbation and it prevented the weeds of sexual vices from growing in my heart as I grew older.
I am 26 years old now, single, working and still proud to be a virgin.
Dedicated to every soul lost in the valley of teenage exorbitance and
sexual vice especially those whose destinies are at the verge of being truncated.
To mothers all over the world who struggle for the uprightness of their kids.
MAY GOD SET THEM FREE.